First Letter Frenzy (a Facebook survey)

                                                                Rules:

Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real; nothing made up. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your own name for the boy/girl name question.

Cheese 'n' Rice! Like readin' a freakin' legal contract....

1. What is your name:
Dan (Dan Dan Bo Ban Fee Fi Fo Fan Ohhhhhhhhh Dan)

2. A four Letter Word:
Dick. (The boys NAME, people! sheesh)

3. A boy's Name:
Dagwood. (And not just the cartoon guy--It's real. I looked it up.)

4. A girl's Name:
Delilah. (Tom Jones, with pants tight and chest bare, sang about her. So tragic.)

5. An occupation:
Dragon Slayer. (Business was better in the middle ages, I hear.)

6. A color:
Damson. (Yeah, like I knew THAT off the top of my head....)

7. Something you'll wear:
Dickie. (Yes, my mom had little turtleneck dickies for Jon and I to wear under our sweaters when we were wee lads.)

8. A book title:
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? (Own it. Read it.)

9. A food:
Duck. (Just don't try to picture it alive.)

10. Something found in the bathroom:
Drowning bugs. (Woe be unto any earwigs found scuttling about the tub at shower time.)

11. A place:
Dublin. (Pink Hearts, Orange Stars, Yellow Moons, Green Clovers, and--NEW--Blue Diamonds!)

12. A reason for being late:
Dead. (It's the ultimate excuse.)

13. Something you'd shout:
Damn it! I'm tired of you trying to confuse this girl's mind! This is her big chance and yours too! You know there are stars in Princeton the same way there are in Hollywood Jack. You want out, you want me to cable Harvard or Yale and get Kong another keeper? (I would shout this if I were Charles Grodin and it was 1976.)

14. A movie title:
Donovan's Brain. (A DEAD MAN'S BRAIN IN A HIDDEN LABORATORY TOLD HIM TO KILL... KILL... KILL... KILL... KILL...)

15. Something you drink:
Dr. Pepper. (Wouldn't YOU like to be a pepper too?)

16. A musical group:
Dokken. (To be shouted while wearing sleevless tshirt and holding lighter above head.)

17. An animal:
Dinosaurus! Alive With Thrills! Today's most astounding adventure...that started a million years ago! (Well, it's a movie ABOUT a dinosaur, which IS an animal....)

18. A street name:
Dan Drive (not far from my very own home.)

19. A type of car:
DeSoto. Coupé, 1939. (A fine looking automobile....)

20. The title of a song:
D'ya Think I'm Sexy (MmHmmm, SING it Rod...)

today...

... as I stepped into the shower, I did my usual spider-check: tub--clear. walls--clear. shower curtain--clear. Then I happened to glance up at the ceiling and saw

THE
SCARIEST
SPIDER
EVER.

It was big as a house.

Well, of course, showering with the beast ready to drop onto my unprotected noggin was out of the question. Luckily, I keep a house-sized glass mason jar for just such emergencies.

I made a run to the kitchen for the jar and, after a brief scuffle, had the eight legged fiend inside. Having first seen the spider on my ceiling should have clued me in that it was a climber, but I didn't (clue-in) until it made an immediate dash up the jar's side toward the open top.

Another mad dash to the kitchen for plastic wrap and it was my hapless prisoner. I was once again in the showering business. You wanna see a picture...?

GAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

A Soviet Agent Who Moved Among the Hollywood Elite

With a radio transmitter hidden in her vacuum cleaner and a homey fire burning in the living room to destroy incriminating documents, Elizaveta Mukasei posed for decades as a housewife while pursuing her real job as a Soviet spy.

Um. This lady had a spy radio vacuum. How cool is that and where can I get one? I wonder if she had a shoe phone or a pen that fires poison darts....

I also wonder if she burned that fire all summer long and the neighbors wondered why there was smoke in the chimney when it was 80 degrees out.

I love it when nutty cold war science fiction stuff turns out to be true.

You can read a whole story about her at The Wall Street Journal.

Getting to know... the latest Facebook survey.

1. What time did you get up this morning?
6am. Well, the alarm went off at 6. I sat slumped over on the edge of the bed like an abandoned stroke victim until about 6:20.

2. How do you like your steak?
I always said medium rare, but it was always too bloody. So then I said medium, but it was STILL usually too bloody. So now I'm thinking of going with medium well....

3. What was the last movie you saw?
[Theatre] Terminator: Salvation - lame collection of cheesy references to the first three movies. One and Two ruled, three and four drooled.
[DVD] Blow Up - A not thrilling, not tense, murder mystery from 1966. Probably slightly more enjoyable if you're high.]
[Netflix Online] Columbo: Fade in to Murder - Awesome! Columbo Rocks and this one had Bill Shatner as the villian. (Double Cool.)

4. What is your favorite TV show?
Ohhhhh... Now: The Mentalist - I like that he's such an egotistical, self-centered smart ass.
Ever: Too many to mention. All the old ones - The Bob Newhart Show, The Incredible Hulk, The Six Million Dollar man, The Adventures of Superman, Hawaii Five-O, Columbo, Mission: Impossible....

5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
The gool old U S of A. And a vacation home in Thailand. Somewhere to the north of Bangkok - cooler.

6. What did you have for breakfast?
A chicken salad sandwich from the service station where I fueled up on the way to work. The package said it came from Minnesota.... Minnesota.

7. What is your favorite cuisine?
I'm so easy to please its pathetic. Will it enable my body to stay alive? Does it do so in a way that avoids permanent injury to me? Then I'm good with it.

8. What foods do you dislike?
Liver - feared and hated by adult children everywhere.

9. Favorite Place to Eat?
See #7.

10. Favorite dressing?
See #7.

11. What kind of vehicle do you drive?
1998 Toyota Camry LE. Silver on the outside, lots of neat compartments and dials on the inside. Generously donated to me by brother Jon.

12. What are your favorite clothes?
When I have to wear 'em (which, sadly, is most of the time) it's whatever is least restrictive, most comfortable.

13. Where would you visit if you had the chance?
Paula said: Greece, Italy, Vermont, Big Sur. And I would follow her anywhere.

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full?
Used to always be half empty. But then it started getting fuller. But it ebbs and flows these days - overall it's fuller than emptier these days.

15. Where would you want to retire?
See #5 and #13.

16. Favorite time of day?
I LOVE staying up late late late at night and watching movies. Mmmm... movies.

17. Where were you born?
The Ninth Circle of Hell. No. That was someone else. Marysville California.

18. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Syncronized swimming, diving, martial arts, dance, gymnastics, and (of course) The World's Strongest Man Competition (w00t)....

19. Who do you think will not tag you back?
Blahdedy-blah-blah.

20. Person you expect to tag you back first?
Joe Momma.

21. Who are you most curious about their responses to this?
I place no man or woman above or below, in front of or behind, any other....

22. Bird watcher?
The main character on the DVD from #3 called women "birds". I'm an equal opportunity people watcher. Not into birds. The feathery ones.

23. Are you a morning person or a night person?
Nightish as the blackest night.

24. Do you have any pets?
Yes. One dog/horse/pig/bull-in-proverbial-china-shop, Isis.

25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share?
No, but I read about a plumber in the UK who gave birth to a 30-years-dead, embryonic absorbed twin, through his belly button. Whoa.

26. What did you want to be when you were little?
An Oceanographer. Like Jacques Cousteau. Who was my hero.

27. What is your best childhood memory?
Hmmm. I think it was that one time... at band camp....

28. Are you a cat or dog person?
I am a human person, thank you very much.

29. Are you married?
Yes, 11 years of marital bliss.

30. Always wear your seat belt?
Yes. Except going from the gas station right next to the train station to the train station right next to the gas station. Then sometimes I don't. But its like a hundred feet and what's gonna happen in a hundred feet?

31. Been in a car accident?
So many; you'd think I'd always wear my seat belt.

32. Any pet peeves?
Just the pet dog. No peeves.

33. Favorite Pizza Toppings?
Cheeeeeeeeeeese....

34. Favorite Flower?
Huh! Flowers are for girls....

35. Favorite ice cream?
If you don't know by now....

36. Favorite fast food restaurant?
Again, see #7.

37. How many times did you fail your driver's test?
None at all.

38. From whom did you get your last email?
Personal: spam from tryitoneverything.com. Work: Ilya Marenkov in Moscow.

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
Credit cards really WERE born in the Ninth Circle of Hell.

40. Do anything spontaneous lately?
No. But my wife did. And we both enjoyed it immensely.

41. Like your job?
Its okay. Pays the bills in a way that doesn't (usually) suck.

42. Broccoli?
Yeah?

43. What was your favorite vacation?
Thailand trip last year.

44. Last person you went out to dinner with?
Alec and Paula

45. What are you listening to right now?
Keyboard, hum of A/C, office mate with allergies, my belly growling.

46. What is your favorite color?
I dunno... blue?

47. How many tattoos do you have?
No. The question IS, How many nipples do I have?

48. How many are you tagging for this quiz?
We'll see....

49. What time did you finish this quiz?
I anticipate some time before I leave the office today.

50. Coffee Drinker?
Does anybody drink coffee just because it tastes good?

51. Current favorite band or artist?
Currently enjoying alanis morissette and The (old time radio) Adventures of Superman on my iPod. Do you think her music has gotten any less angry these days?

52. Current favorite movie?
Mmmm... I haven't seen it yet, but I recently heard of a movie called Nudist Colony of the Dead. It's a zombie flick. Sounds entertaining.

THE END

Danny's Big Day at the Library

So I went to the library to check out some books.

"Excuse me", I asked. Do you have Craig Ferguson's new memoir, "American on Purpose"?

Ms. Moanz - former playmate and current head librarian - looked up, her smoldering eyes meeting mine and then moving lazily down my body: shoulders... chest... stomach....

Her examination apparently blocked by the waist-height checkout counter, she leaned out and across, firm breasts thrust into prominence by her form fitting v-neck sweater, to continue. Liking what she saw, her lips pursed into an "O" of sensual satisfaction and a tiny gasp escaped her throat, drawing looks from other patrons and one of the other staff.

"Thank heavens I wore the extra large codpiece today", I said to myself.

Suddenly, an explosion rocked the room's audio-visual section! I whirled, searching for it's cause, as six men wearing ski masks rushed through the browsing area, automatic weapons in hand. One separated from the others and, arm cocked, prepared to lob a second grenade, this one into the nearly filled-to-capacity children's story hour area.

"Not on my watch, friend!" I muttered.

Ducking behind 'Fiction: Ha-Ho', I unholstered the government-issue Walther P99 from my left shoulder and drew a bead on the man's forehead.

Calmly, I squeezed the trigger.

I told coworker Rebecca I was writing about my recent trip to the library - she thought it might be a dull subject and suggested I spice it up with a bit of sex and violence.

So I spiced.

What ACTUALLY happened, is while I was looking over my Amazon.com Shopping List, woe-is-me-ing about not having any extra cash to throw its way, I REMEMBERED about the library. Libraries are so cool. And so free. I don't know why that never seems to stay in my brain for very long.

I decided to see if any of my shopping list was available in the Salt Lake County library system. I found five books. A minute later they were all on hold and a day after that 4 of the 5 were ready to be picked up. Which they were, by me.

Now, with multiple books, the question always becomes (for me) which to read first, second and so on. I had my choice of giant killer crabs, giant killer sharks, Swedish vampire love and... Craig Ferguson's novel about a bunch of crazy degenerates.

It's a cinch that pretty much any monster wins out over Craig Ferguson (sorry Craig, but you're only a regular human). The vampire story promises to be good, but I'm not a huge vampire fan, overall. And while I pretty much love ALL giant killer things, sharks have been a fascination for me since I was a wee boy. And crabs... eh. They pinch. You avoid them on the beach. And so on.

Sharks took first place.

Meg: Hell's Aquarium
Now, this is not "just" a killer shark novel. No, this is the fourth installment in a killer shark novel SERIES. (Come to poppa! And yes, I've already read the other three.) None of the series is what you'd call "fine literature", but are all written by a talented guy who *obviously* loves giant killer things as much as I do.

I mean, how d'you go wrong with an 80 foot prehistoric momma shark, five 20-50 foot prehistoric baby sharks, all crammed into a Sea World type aquarium that's open to the public? Just how many things might potentially go awry in this situation?

So many things. So many. A thoroughly enjoyable book. Very gratifying.

Clickers
While crabs aren't as exciting as sharks, the ones herein WERE both giants and killers. That counts for something, so their book came next. It was a quick read. And it sucked. Started out well enough (though the writing was REALLY ham-fisted), with several isolated boat and beach goers getting sliced and diced by prehistoric crabs. Scream. Run. Stumble. Crunch.

But then the crab rampage inexplicably got eclipsed by the arrival of a bunch of creature-from-the-black-lagoon-ish things (carrying tridents, no less), who proceeded to run about stabbing and eating folks and blahdehdah blahdehdah blah. Tridents? I appreciated that the book's authors were (again, obviously) fellow lovers of giant killer things, but... I pretty much forced myself through the last hundred pages.

(I couldn't just STOP reading since you never know when things might start to improve.)

Let the Right One In
Badly in need of having my monster faith restored, this was my third read. This novel was... amazing.

A. MAZ. ING.

Bully-beleaguered boy meets up with creepily endearing vampire girl. Set in 1980s Stockholm, it tells of budding romance between lonely kid Oskar and just-as-lonely vampire Eli. First, they start a nerdy little friendship which then turns into a nerdy little romance. A chaste one, since they're only 13 and 12, respectively.

And don't let the word 'romance' throw you, there's plenty of vampire death and dismemberment in here too. (Plenty.) But its the writing in this thing that is so brilliant. The author magically breathes life into his characters, and by mid-story they feel like old friends (or enemies) that you know you're gonna miss (or breathe a sigh of relief) when they're gone. I'm guessing this guy could write about a kitchen broom in a corner and make it work.

Fantastic.

Between the Bridge and the River
So now, with nothing left to tempt me away, I'm in the middle of Ferguson's novel. Which is good. Monster free, but good. Sharp witted, sarcastic commentary. Interesting if somewhat creepy characters. It basically follows a couple of childhood pals through all the muckety muck of their lives while they attempt to "find" themselves.

I'm more looking forward to the fifth book I put on hold - Ferguson's new memoir - "American on Purpose". Yes, that really WAS one of the books I went to the library for. (And if THAT part of the story is true.... What else might be...?)

I gotta go clean my codpiece gun.

Why Cigarettes Really Are Good For You

They help you get the girl....

They make you feel young again....

They help separate fact from fiction....

The more you smoke, the more nice things you have....

They heighten romance....

They complement jewelry....

They bring families together....

Women behave provocatively when you smoke in front of them....

They're good for skin color....

M.A.S.H. Doctors use them to strengthen morale....

Smoking is friendly....

They bring out your individuality....

They aid in personal reflection....

They're a great pick-me-up during battlefield lulls....

They taste minty, not mediciney....

They are a great way to say I'm Sorry....

They epitomize Christmas cheer....

Wrestlers use them for that extra advantage in the ring....

They're dreamy....

They're round and firm; everyone likes that....

Girls gasp when you show how big they are....

They're pretty....

They double as nose rings....

You're favorite sports teams do better when you smoke....

President Reagan loved 'em....

They decrease air turbulence....

You sound sexier over the phone....

Science vouches for them....

Doctors know they're great for your T-Zone....

Santa carries them in his Toy Bag....

Children are enchanted by them....

They help women fit in better with their men....

John Wayne endorses them; what could be better than that?

Credit where credit is due: I took most of these ads from a very groovy design blog, WellMedicated. Check him out. But the pithy sayings are all mine....

The Fifty Things

01. Who was your last text from?
Silly Rabbit; Texts are for kids!

02. Where was your default picture taken?
Took it between the car and office, with my handy dandy Snap-O-Matic.

03. Your relationship status?
Oh-So-Happily-Married.

04. Have you ever lost a close friend?
Apparently not.

05. What is your current mood?
...cautiously upbeat?

06. How many siblings do you have?
A Big Brother, a Little Brother and a Little Sister.

07. What are your brother(s)/sister(s) names in birth order?
Jon, me, Tony, Tawnya. Tawnya's the girl.

08. Where do you wish you were right now?
Relaxing atop my money-pile.

09. Have a crazy side?
Um, once I met a guy with a crazy eye....

10. Ever had a near death experience?
I've been to an in-law Christmas party. Kind of the same thing.

11. Something you do a lot?
write... read... watch crappy movies. QUALITY crappy movies.

12. Angry at anyone?
Don't make me hungry. You wouldn't like me when I'm hungry!

13. What's stopping you from going for the person you like?
She's all the way in the living room. It's a long walk.

14. When was the last time you cried?
When the bad guy got what he deserved on Law & Order. I know.

15. Is there anyone you would do anything for?
Probably a lot of people i would do anything for.

16. What do you think about when you are falling asleep?
What do you sleep about when you're falling athink?

17. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
My Sweet Paulie.

18. What is your favorite song?
No such thing. But right now I'm in a Neil Diamond mood.

19. What are you doing right now?
Wasting away what little free time I have.

20. Who do you trust right now?
What do you mean I don't trust people? It's funny that you would say that! Is there something wrong with that? Why is that something wrong to do? I don't understand that. Why are you pointing the finger at other people all the time? Why don't you point the finger at yourself?

21. Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
Well, there was this other shirt Tawnya got me as a present, but I didn't like it so I took it back and got one I did like. With Tawnya's blessing. She even gave me the receipt.

22. Have you kissed someone in the past week?
My Sweet Paula and my dog. She's a good kisser. So is Paula.

23. Who is your friend that lives closest to you?
Wife/Friend Paula.

24. Describe your life in one word?
Glatitastical. It means: Having the quality of Glatitast; referring to an event of Glatitastic proportion or significance.

25. Who are you thinking of right now?
Friend Angie in the hospital.

26. What should you be doing right now?
Don't you think "should" is overrated?

27. What are you listening to?
Dog snores.

28. Who was the last person who gave you a hug?
My Hunny - we hugged each other.

29. Who was the last person who yelled at you?
Hmm. Probably my Hunny. Been awhile, though.

30. Do you act differently around the person you like?
She sometimes wishes I did.

31. What is your natural hair color?
Reddish brown

32. Who was the last person to make you laugh?
Nook.

33. Who was the last person to make you sad?
Whoever came up with these questions.

34. What do you hear?
Veronica Mars from Hillary's room, the swamp cooler.

35. Is your hair curly or straight?
Straightish. Wavy when it gets longer. Big Bold Beautiful curls when it's super long.

36. Has anyone ever called you "scrumptious" before?
I call me scrumptious whilst lounging about in my leather undies....

37. Do you have a best friend?
A man can always hope....

38. Held hands with the opposite sex in the past 3 days?
I held Paula's luscious... hands. Yes. I did.

39. Do you use smiley faces on the computer?
OH I'M NOT FALLING FOR THAT OLD TRICK AGAIN....

40. Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle?
Mmm. Changed for and from the gym in my car a few weeks ago.

41. Are you happy with life right now?
Yes, thank the Lord. I am.

42. Are you currently jealous?
Jealous of my beefcake self whenever I pass a mirror.

43. What jewelery are you currently wearing?
I'm jewelry-naked.

44. What were you doing on Friday night?
Uh. I think I might have been at an ice cream tasting party. It's possible. If not, I was watching a really cool movie about all these ants being possessed by an alien and waging war on humanity but all they really wanted was to be understood. I might've done both of those things on Friday.

45. Have you ever had your heart broken?
Only by you.

46. Have you ever broken someone's heart?
Only yours.

47. Is there anybody you're really disappointed in right now?
My financial adviser. He might as well be a figment of my imagination, for all the good he does me.

48. What was the last reason you went to the doctor for?
Prescription refills.

49. How late did you stay up last night and why?
Like... ten thirty, cause by Wednesday my steam's startin' to run low.

50. Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?
I think about 6 months was the record before I tried my hand at marriage(s).

today...

...i watched The Iron Giant, on my ipod, during the train ride home.

When it got to the part where the giant sacrificed himself to stop the missile from blowing up the town, my eyes got all teary.

And then I started sniffling.

And then I started making little choking-back-sobs-in-my-throat noises.

And then the lady across from me looked at me like i was weird or something.

I'm the world's nerdiest nerd.

15 Reasons Mr. Rogers Was the Best Neighbor Ever

I saw this at mentalfloss.com and, being a Fred fan, it touched me....

15 Reasons Mr. Rogers Was the Best Neighbor Ever
By Mangesh Hattikudur - November 7, 2008

1. Even Koko the Gorilla loved him

Most people have heard of Koko, the Stanford-educated gorilla who could speak about 1000 words in American Sign Language, and understand about 2000 in English. What most people don’t know, however, is that Koko was an avid Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood fan. As Esquire reported, when Fred Rogers took a trip out to meet Koko for his show, not only did she immediately wrap her arms around him and embrace him, she did what she’d always seen him do onscreen: she proceeded to take his shoes off!

2. He Made Thieves Think Twice

According to a TV Guide piece on him, Fred Rogers drove a plain old Impala for years. One day, however, the car was stolen from the street near the TV station. When Rogers filed a police report, the story was picked up by every newspaper, radio and media outlet around town. Amazingly, within 48 hours the car was left in the exact spot where it was taken from, with an apology on the dashboard. It read, “If we’d known it was yours, we never would have taken it.”

3. He Watched His Figure to the Pound!

In covering Rogers’ daily routine (waking up at 5; praying for a few hours for all of his friends and family; studying; writing, making calls and reaching out to every fan who took the time to write him; going for a morning swim; getting on a scale; then really starting his day), writer Tom Junod explained that Mr. Rogers weighed in at exactly 143 pounds every day for the last 30 years of his life. He didn’t smoke, didn’t drink, didn’t eat the flesh of any animals, and was extremely disciplined in his daily routine. And while I’m not sure if any of that was because he’d mostly grown up a chubby, single child, Junod points out that Rogers found beauty in the number 143. According to the piece, Rogers came “to see that number as a gift… because, as he says, “the number 143 means ‘I love you.’ It takes one letter to say ‘I’ and four letters to say ‘love’ and three letters to say ‘you’: One hundred and forty-three.”

4. He Saved Both Public Television and the VCR

Strange but true: When the government wanted to cut Public Television funds in 1969, the relatively unknown Mister Rogers went to Washington. Almost straight out of a Capra film, his 5-6 minute testimony on how TV had the potential to give kids hope and create more productive citizens was so simple but passionate that even the most gruff politicians were charmed. While the budget should have been cut, the funding instead jumped from $9 to $22 million. Rogers also spoke to Congress, and swayed senators into voting to allow VCR’s to record television shows from the home. It was a cantankerous debate at the time, but his argument was that recording a program like his allowed working parents to sit down with their children and watch shows as a family.

5. He Might Have Been the Most Tolerant American Ever

Mister Rogers seems to have been almost exactly the same off-screen as he was onscreen. As an ordained Presbyterian minister, and a man of tremendous faith, Mister Rogers preached tolerance first. Whenever he was asked to castigate non-Christians or gays for their differing beliefs, he would instead face them and say, with sincerity, “God loves you just the way you are.” Often this provoked ire from fundamentalists.

6. He Was Genuinely Curious about Others

Mister Rogers was known as one of the toughest interviews because he’d often befriend reporters, asking them tons of questions, taking pictures of them, compiling an album for them at the end of their time together, and calling them after to check in on them and hear about their families. He wasn’t concerned with himself, and genuinely loved hearing the life stories of others. Amazingly, it wasn’t just with reporters. Once, on a fancy trip up to a PBS exec’s house, he heard the limo driver was going to wait outside for 2 hours, so he insisted the driver come in and join them (which flustered the host). On the way back, Rogers sat up front, and when he learned that they were passing the driver’s home on the way, he asked if they could stop in to meet his family. According to the driver, it was one of the best nights of his life—the house supposedly lit up when Rogers arrived, and he played jazz piano and bantered with them late into the night. Further, like with the reporters, Rogers sent him notes and kept in touch with the driver for the rest of his life.

7. He was Color-blind

Literally. He couldn’t see the color blue. Of course, he was also figuratively color-blind, as you probably guessed. As were his parents who took in a black foster child when Rogers was growing up.

8. He Could Make a Subway Car full of Strangers Sing

Once while rushing to a New York meeting, there were no cabs available, so Rogers and one of his colleagues hopped on the subway. Esquire reported that the car was filled with people, and they assumed they wouldn’t be noticed. But when the crowd spotted Rogers, they all simultaneously burst into song, chanting “It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood.” The result made Rogers smile wide.

9. He got into TV because he hated TV.

The first time he turned one on, he saw people angrily throwing pies in each other’s faces. He immediately vowed to use the medium for better than that. Over the years he covered topics as varied as why kids shouldn’t be scared of a haircut, or the bathroom drain (because you won’t fit!), to divorce and war.

10. He was an Ivy League Dropout.

Rogers moved from Dartmouth to Rollins College to pursue his studies in music.

11. He composed all the songs on the show,

And over 200 other tunes.

12. He was a perfectionist, and disliked ad-libbing.

He felt he owed it to children to make sure every word on his show was thought out.

13. Michael Keaton got his start on the show

As an assistant– helping puppeteer and operate the trolley.

14. Several characters on the show are named for his family.

Queen Sara is named after Rogers’ wife, and the postman Mr. McFeely is named for his maternal grandfather who always talked to him like an adult, and reminded young Fred that he made every day special just by being himself. Sound familiar? It was the same way Mister Rogers closed every show.

15. The sweaters.

Every one of the cardigans he wore on the show had been hand-knit by his mother.

I thought I would take a moment...

...to show you my favorite Christmas present EVER.

(EV. ER.)

Yes... yes it IS a King Kong nightshirt with matching nightcap.

And you're thinking - HOW did this happen?

WHERE could he possibly have obtained such a marvel?

...Not at the King Kong Store (would that there were such a paradise).

Nope, instead, my sweet wife made it for me. Well, she got by with a little help from her friend. Y'know, like the Beatles.

Some weeks before Christmas, she snuck my other nightshirt with matching nightcap out of my jammie drawer, took it over to Diana's house and Diana helped her make - The Kong Sleeper.

 
Why (you may ask) didn't I notice my original nightshirt missing from the jammie drawer? Because. I don't wear it much - even in the winter. IT. IS. SO. HOT. You could sleep outdoors, in December, in this thing. Really.

So the new Kong Sleeper is a much, much lighter fabric that I can stand to be in while I sleep. And it's so hep, to boot.


Oh, and which Kong version do we have pictured on the shirt?

Indeed, you are correct - it's from 1962s King Kong versus Godzilla. Note the impressive detail. Eighth Wonder....

The nightcap is the finishing touch... the - crown - if you will. (Get it? Crown? KING Kong?)

 
Ohhh, I kill myself sometimes....

Anyway, for your added enjoyment, photos of all the screen Kongs I can think of....

First, we have the original and still top gun - (King Kong) from 1933. Willis O'Brien did the effects that just rocked the movie-going world and stand up pretty well even now.


Then, 30 years later, things went straight to hell with 1962s Japanese take - (King Kong versus Godzilla)....


1967 brought another Japanese attempt - (King Kong Escapes). Marginally cooler. But far, far from actually being cool.


A measurable increase in dignity came in 1976 with Dino DeLaurentis' remake, (King Kong). Really, this generally maligned version was a pretty good attempt - it gets panned these days 'cause it was a VERY 70s movie and doesn't age well, IMHO. And Rick Baker in the suit was just amazing.


1986's (King Kong Lives), a sequel by DeLaurentis, has Kong SURVIVING his 110 story fall and getting an artificial heart so he's good as new.... The movie was just as bad as this photo makes it look.


And Peter Jackson's remake in 2005 (King Kong) finally brought Kong back to his former glory. Nearly. As much as you can with a classic like the original was. Jackson grew up loving the original and wanting to pay homage to it rather than just "remake" it. And he did a nice job - the movie has heart.

The fact is, while I saw it at the theater once and now own it on DVD, I haven't watched it a second time because it was quite disturbing to me when the ape got shot up at the end. That's what happens when you get an ape that feels real throughout the film and you get to care about him. I'm a sentimental old fool....

 
yeah. so THE END